In memory of Annais Apelian Toutikian

 Vahe H. Apelian

Anna-the-bride (Anna Titizian Apelian), Anna Khatcher Chelebian, 
Annais Apelian Toutikian, Annie Chelebian Hoglind

Yesterday I read that Annais (Apelian) Toutikiian succumbed to her illness and passed away on Thursday January 2, 2025, in Canada. She was a family relation. My late mother took special pride noting that Annais was dressed up for her wedding to Joseph Toutikiian in her house in Antelias, Lebanon and that she escorted her out for her wedding.  She took immense pride in seeing the family Annais and Joseph had formed and wrote about her sentiments in that regard in a Kessab yearbook of years past.

The family relations were deep. Annais paternal grandfather Kerop Apelian was my mother’s maternal uncle, that is to say Kerop was the brother of mother’s mother, my maternal grandmother Karoun (Apelian) Chelebian. Annais’ mother Sirvart Chelebian, was my mother's paternal aunt, that is to say Sirvart was the daughter of my mother’s  paternal uncle.  My maternal grandparents Khacher Chelebian and Karoun Apelian were married in their makeshift camp in Attiyeh Syria, where they were driven in 1915 along many Kessabtsis, instead of to Deir ez Zor.

Annais’ obituary noted that she was born in 1950 in Keurkune, Kessab, Apelian family’s ancestral village. That makes her four years my junior. There is also much history associated with Annais’ name as well, that goes way back to her paternal grandmother Anna (Titilzian) Apelian. Annais’ brother, the late Kevork George Apelian immortalized their paternal grandmother Anna in his book, “Anna the bride”. 

Annais’ grandmother Anna’s marriage to Kerop had been the sensational event in Kessab of their days. It had come about by elopement. Anna had done the unthinkable. She had crossed all by herself in the darkness of the night and through the eerie silence of the  gorge and walked all alone all the way from the coastal village Kaladouran to Keurkune to her lover's parent's house, to the utter astonishment of his parents and only sister, my grandmother Karoun. Something had gone terribly wrong. Trusted intermediaries had worked out a plan. Kerop and his friends were to meet Anna in the cover of the night and escort her to his house. But the lovers missed either the rendezvous point or the timing, so Anna took upon herself to finish the task and walked to  Kerop’s parent's house and waited for her lover’s return. Never in greater Kessab had a girl walked all by herself to her lover’s house before. She had always been free spirited with a mind of her own and was also known for her beauty. 

Anna, however, was not to experience the tranquility of a family life with the man she chose to love. In time Kerop Apelian left his pregnant wife Anna and their firstborn child Kevork behind in Keurkune, under the care of his parents and sister, my grandmother Karoun,  and joined his two brothers in New York to have his family join him after settling in the New World. When his pregnant wife gave birth to their second son, Kerop sent word from America to name him James for the family was to join him in America. But that was not to be. 

In June 1915, Anna and her two young sons; her in laws, Kerop’s father Hanno, and Kerop’s mother, also Anna; and her sister-in-law, my maternal grandmother Karoun, were forcefully driven into the interior of Syria. Only my grandmother Karoun and Anna’s young son James survived the ordeal. The rest fell victims to the first genocide of the 20th century.   

"Anna the Bride" by Kevork George Apelian.
The book has been translated to Arabic,
 English by Annie Hoglind
and to Italian

In time James Apelian joined his father in America but did not want to live there, and returned to keurkune where he married Sirvart Chelebian, my maternal grandmother Karoun (Apelian) Chelebian’s sister-in-law.  Three children survived to adulthood from that marriage, Kevork George, Annais, and Kerop.

James and Sirvart (Chelebian) Apelian had named their first-born daughter Anna, in memory of child’s paternal grandmother Anna. But the child died in her infancy. My widowed grandmother’s youngest child also named Anna,  died of pneumonia when she was vivacious sixteen years old beautiful girl and was also buried in the Keurkune’s ancient cemetery next to her father Khatcher who also had died due to pneumonia at the age of 38. Anna’s tombstone reads in Armenian: “Here rests Anna K. Chelebian (1928-1945), “Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God” (Mathew 5:8). 

My grandmother Karoun ruled out naming any daughter Anna, henceforth. But the memories of the Annas lingered. Thus, a variation of the name Anna evolved in the persons of my maternal cousin Annie (Chelebian) Hoglind, and in the person of Annais (Apelian) Toutikian. Both of whom became proud grandmothers.

I convey my deepest condolences to Annais’ husband Joseph and their two sons Haig James, Troy Aram and daughter Maria Sira and their children.

 

He Was Different - Ան Ուրիշ էր

Բնագիրը կցուաց է Attached is my translation of Simon Simonian’s poignant story about his mother. The story is titled "He Was Different" - "An Ourish Er - Ան Ուրիշ Էր. It was the first story in Simon Simonian's book titled "The Mountaineers' Twilight” - “Լեռնականներու Վերջալոյսը”, published in Beirut in 1968. Vahe H. Apelian

Bédo was my mother’s first husband and my father’s bosom friend. My father and Bédo had worked together in the same mill. After Bedo’s death my father married his wife, my mother.

After his death, Bédo has continued living in our house and continues to live as a husband, as a father and as a friend, but as a foe of a friend. My father, who had loved him as a brother, is the only one who is discontented with Bédo coming back to life. His animosity started after Bédo’s interment. I remember well, during my childhood, every time there was bad feeling between my mother and my father, the person responsible for the trouble was Bédo who worked in mysterious ways after his death much like all the great souls, saints and heroes do after their deaths.

Bédo was not a saint or a hero. He was a mere Sassountsi from the Dalvorig village. He was the son of an ironsmith. His father had worked in the Dalvorig mines extracting iron from the rock veins and melting it to make plows, hatchets, shovels, pickaxes, and rifles. The guns were muzzle type with which he, his brothers and the villagers had defended themselves against attacks by Kurds and Turks. The leaders of the Armenians were Mourad (Hampartsoum Boyandjian), Mihran Damadian, “Baron” Vahan, Kevork Chavoush and other luminaries of the time. It is in honor of Bédo’s father and his comrades that the once popular patriotic song, “I am a Brave Son of Dalvorig”, was sung.

At twenty Bédo had left Sassoun and after working in mills, had settled in Aintab much like many Sassountsis. At twenty-five, he had married my mother Ménnoush who was barely eighteen then. Bédo, a handsome, brave young man, had captivated my mother’s heart.

“Mother, was Bédo handsome?” I used to ask my mother in my childhood as she recounted stories about him.

“There was no other like him,” my mother would say and continue: “He had dark eyebrows and moustache; a handsome posture, a proportioned face. He dressed like a bég. All the girls in our town noted his manly handsomeness. Lucky you, the women would tell me…..”

To validate her description, she would open her old chest, the dowry chest, which along with her and much like her, was becoming a worn down witness of old and happy days. From underneath the moth laden, malodorous, dark blue, apricot and pearl-colored worn out clothes, she would pull out her photo bundle, unwrap its silky shroud and hand to me her wedding picture so that I would look at Bédo, her Bédo.

My mother’s recollection would fill my soul with fascination towards the man who had once been my mother’s husband. To further stress so that I would not waver from the impression I harbored of the dead man, my mother would add: “In this picture he does not look as handsome as he was. Hey, bygone days. We took this picture in haste. He had just returned from the mill and was covered with flour all over. The neighbors were having their pictures taken. In our days, women did not go to the photographer’s shop. We had this picture taken on the spur of that very moment because he refused to change his clothes”

At times, during these mysterious viewing sessions, my father would happen to suddenly step in the house. My mother, with tears still in her eyes, would wrap the picture and place it back. My father, silent and sad, would sit at a corner and inhale the smoke from his cigarette more deeply than usual. My father’s sad silence would last for days, sometimes for even weeks during which time he would not speak with my mother. That absent person beyond the grave thus caused a lot of heartache between my father and my mother. My father’s sadness, my mother’s tears and the omnipresence of the departed would fill my childhood soul with an unexplainable mystery.

During winter, whenever my father would be absent for months on end working in the mills, my mother would sit around the oven area during the evenings and tell us about Bédo who had told her father “let your ‘yes’ not be a ‘no’”. After long deliberation, her father had consented to give his daughter away in marriage to Bédo. After their engagement, during which they had seen each other only once, seven years of blissful marriage followed.

“He was an out of the ordinary man”, my mother would tell us;  “whenever he missed home, whether there was snow or blizzard, he would walk for four hours in the cold of the night just to come home.”

Of course my mother was the repository of his joy. They thus lived happily but without a child. My mother had believed that on the seventh year of their marriage, she would conceive and carry his child. The seventh year brought with it the unexpected, Bédo’s sudden death in the mill during work. There is no need to visualize my mother’s torment and agony. My mother would recount his elaborate funeral procession and the overwhelming sadness among the Sassountsis and would particularly emphasize my father’s inconsolable lament over the loss of his bosom friend. Time did not heal my mother’s wounds. There had remained only one thing for my mother, visiting her husband’s gravesite even in the dead of the winter.

“I remember well,” my mother would say. “It was Vartanants Day and I needed to visit his grave at any cost. Our cemetery did not have walls or guards. There was the fear of wolves. My mother was with me. As I was walking among the graves, suddenly Bédo appeared in front of me in the same dress we had him dressed for his interment. I froze. He looked at me and said, ‘return home and do not come here anymore’. My mother arrived and saw me standing still. I told her nothing about the occurrence. I grabbed her arm and we returned home. We had not reached Bédo’s grave yet. My mother remained perplexed.”.

That day became a turning point for my mother. From there on she found refuge in her needlework. From a whole year’s labor she raised enough funds to place a tombstone on Bedo’s grave, on which she had inscribed:

However, the thick tombstone with all its weight has not been able to contain Bédo’s heart that continues to live on this earth, that is to say, in my mother’s bosom.

A year passed. My father proposed to marry her. They got married. They started having children. My mother devoted herself to raising her children. But she never forgot her Bédo. The passing years and responsibilities crystallized Bédo’s love like a diamond that my mother keeps in her heart. In fact, it’s the only crystal she carries in her heart. She raised her children in memory of Bédo. My mother is convinced that we are Bedo’s children for, as a matter of fact, Bédo had appeared to her the day before her conception. Without the apparition of Bédo, she claimed, she had never conceived. Bédo had become our Holy Ghost

My mother had willed that when she died, she should be buried next to Bédo. However, her exile put an end to that vow. But my mother had taken another solemn vow that neither exile nor war or anything earthly would deter her from that solemn vow. In her after life she would be with her Bédo. My father knew about my mother’s alarming preference. That is why he remained melancholic the rest of his life. He knew that there was a fateful separation in store for him in afterlife.

My mother’s preference had me ponder. I have thought that her first love, Bédo’s handsomeness and bravery, the loss of her youthful happiness influenced her decision to make her preference known to us. But there was something different with my mother. Whenever I quizzed her, she would only say: "He was different.”

My mother admits that my father, her second husband, has been virtuous, God-fearing, good natured, just and has always treated her kindly. But all my father’s virtues have given way to the appeal of the deceased. My mother, in her essence, remains the spouse of the deceased. My father carries a wound that never healed because of my mother’s total devotion to Bédo. That is why his once bosom friend Bédo, has become his foe after his death for whom he can do no harm with his living self. The other, on the other hand, from the beyond, continues to aggravate my father on Earth.

We, the children, presented alternating stands towards our two fathers. In our childhood, through my mother’s tales, we deeply loved Bédo. When we grew older and realized our father’s pain, we sided with him and pounded Bédo, who through his interference from the world beyond, caused so much grief to our father. Our assault for a while bore fruits. Bédo’s downfall started. But we could never dethrone him for my mother continued to open her wooden chest, unwrap the bundle and with her fingers caress the pictures while murmuring softly “He was different.”

We ended our teens, rounded our twenties and became more mature. We ceased to side with either of my parents. It was the period of our neutrality. We let our mother receive her extraterrestrial visitor in our home and continue her affair with him. But we did not let her verbalize her preference to us.

There remains the last chapter for us that will start in the afterlife. We are sure that a separation will take place, our mother will re-join with her Bédo who is surely waiting impatiently for her. We will remain with our father. Separated from us, our mother will miss us. She will vacillate between her Bédo and us. She will want to join us with Bédo in a threesome arrangement of sorts. My father who despised the francophone triangle and the ghostly presence of Bédo will not want to have his erstwhile friend turn his foe in our midst. We, who were not accustomed to such things on Earth, will reject our mother’s proposition. With each passing day, our mother will miss us more and more. She will eventually concede, leave her Bédo behind and join us, and we will have our family anew.                                                      

 

                                                             ***

I wrote this piece after a long delay and reader be mindful that my mother is an old woman as I write about her Bédo. She has heard from my brothers that I write about Sassountsis. She confronted me once and said: “Son, let it not be that you write about Bédo. He was not like Mano or Magar. He was different…..”

Forgive me mother, for I wrote about your Bédo.”

    Բնագիրը՝ 

Armenia’s 2024 peace time heroes

Vahe H Apelian

“The Hero of Our Times (2024)” was held at the Karen Demirchyan Sports and Concert Complex in Yerevan.

The event was attended by the President of the Republic of Armenia Vahagn Khachaturyan, the Prime Minister of the Republic of Armenia Nikol Pashinyan with his wife Anna Hakobyan, the Speaker of the National Assembly Alen Simonyan, the President of the Constitutional Court Arman Dilanyan, representatives of the legislative, executive, judicial, local self-government bodies and other officials.

“The Hero of Our Times” program was prepared by the Public Relations and Information Center of the Prime Minister’s Office of the Republic of Armenia. After paying due homage to the Aremnian armed forces and to those who were maytyred, 12+1 awards were presented. 

The Minister of Education, Science and Higher Education Zhanna Andreasyan welcomed the attendees. She emphasized that as the head of the state department in the field of education, she particularly notes the importance of education, science, in alleviating the needs of the country and in the burden over the government by providing opportunities for employment in Armenia, where there will be bread to stay.

The main award was presented to the 13^th recipient Armen Mardirosian, by the PM Nikol Pashinyan who made a speech and congratulated everyone on the occasion of the award ceremony.

The recording I watched, which covered the whole event from the beginning to the end was 2 hours and 13 minutes long and was enriched with music, and dance. Each award was presented by a different person, two of whom were the last year’s recepients. A few of the recepients were visibly emotional.

It was a pleasure for me to watch the program this year as well. It is a shame that Diaspora Armenian schools, and organizations for young and upcoming have not made a habit of presenting the recorded program of Armenia's peace time heroes to their students and their young members. A win-win endeavor. 

Attached are the 12+1 award winners in the order of their coming onto the stage to receive their awards after being introduced to the audience,  I screen shot. 

1.   Avetis Yeganyan and Gohar Tadevosyan - Ավետիս Եգանյան եւ Գոհար Թադեվոսյան - Founders of Avetis Arts & Crafts Store of leather goods.

 

2.    Mamikon and Ashot Mikayelyans - Մամիկոն եւ ԱշոտՄիքայելյաններ, sculpturing, metal art works. 

 

3.    Harutyun Arakelyan - Յարություն Առաքելեան, an award winning boxer who runs a boxing school for children. His boxing philosophy is to respect the opponent and have the opponent respect the person. 

 

4.   Arpine Ghukasyan - Արփինէ Ղուկասյան fashion designer and dress maker. 

 

5.   Edgar Abrahamyan - Էդգար Աբրահամյան – manufacture of flags and everythign related to flags. 

 

6.   Armen Avetyan and Tartevik Khachatryan - Արմեն Ավետյան եւ Տարթեվիկ խաչատրյան- engineers who run a school teaching robotics to children.

 

7.   Tigran Gyulumyan - Տիգրան Գյուլումյան – actor, director of open-air theater in rural Armenia.

 

8.   Karine Musikyan - Կարինե Սուսիկյան – A graduate of Yerevan State Conservatory after Komitas runs her own vocal studio teaching children Armenian folk song. Her students  performed during the ceremony singing a song from Sayat Nova.

 

9.   Tatevik Ghaltakhchyan - Տաթեւիկ Ղալթախչյան – Runs her own TEVQ art studio of hanhandmade jewelry and ceramics and teaches the young the art.

 

 

10.                  Ashot Safaryan - Աշոտ Սաֆարյան -After finishing his studies in Yerevan, he returned to his native village Vosgevan and founded IT OK teaching computer graphics to the local kids. 

11.                 Asya and Armen Grigoryans - Ասյա եւ Արմեն Գրիգորյաններ – A father and daughter team who design and manufacture children’s shoes.

12.                 Eric Hakhverdyan - Էրիկ Հախվերդյան runs an echo friendly organic gardening in his native village Pertavan.

13.                 Armen Martirosyan Արմեն Մարտիրոսյան – considers public health his mission and life's work. Through the «Children's Heathg Foundationn of Armenia», he founded he helps children with serious heath problemns receive treatment. 

Note: the video for those interested to watch. 

 

Armenia’s 2024 peace time heroes

Vahe H Apelian

“The Hero of Our Times (2024)” was held at the Karen Demirchyan Sports and Concert Complex in Yerevan.

The event was attended by the President of the Republic of Armenia Vahagn Khachaturyan, the Prime Minister of the Republic of Armenia Nikol Pashinyan with his wife Anna Hakobyan, the Speaker of the National Assembly Alen Simonyan, the President of the Constitutional Court Arman Dilanyan, representatives of the legislative, executive, judicial, local self-government bodies and other officials.

“The Hero of Our Times” program was prepared by the Public Relations and Information Center of the Prime Minister’s Office of the Republic of Armenia. After paying due homage to the Aremnian armed forces and to those who were maytyred, 12+1 awards were presented. 

The Minister of Education, Science and Higher Education Zhanna Andreasyan welcomed the attendees. She emphasized that as the head of the state department in the field of education, she particularly notes the importance of education, science, in alleviating the needs of the country and in opening new opportunities for employment in Armenia.

The main award was presented to the 13^th recipient Armen Mardirosian, by the PM Nikol Pashinyan who made a speech and congratulated everyone on the occasion of the award ceremony.

The recording I watched, which covered the whole event from the beginning to the end was 2 hours and 13 minutes long and was enriched with music, and dance. Each award was presented by a different person, two of whom were the last year’s recepients. A few of the recepients were visibly emotional.

It was a pleasure for me to watch the program this year as well. It is a shame that Diaspora Armenian schools, and organizations for young and upcoming have not made a habit of presening the recorded program to their student and their young members.  

Attached are the 12+1 award winners in the order of their coming onto the stage to receive their awards after being introduced to the audience.  I screen shot. 

1.   Avetis Yeganyan and Gohar Tadevosyan - Ավետիս Եգանյան եւ Գոհար Թադեվոսյան - Founders of Avetis Arts & Crafts Store of leather goods.

 

2.    Mamikon and Ashot Mikayelyans - Մամիկոն եւ ԱշոտՄիքայելյաններ, sculpturing, metal art works. 

 

3.    Harutyun Arakelyan - Յարություն Առաքելեան, an award winning boxer who runs a boxing school for children. His boxing philosophy is to respect the opponent and have the opponent respect the person. 

 

4.   Arpine Ghukasyan - Արփինէ Ղուկասյան fashion designer and dress maker. 

 

5.   Edgar Abrahamyan - Էդգար Աբրահամյան – manufacture of flags and everythign related to flags. 

 

6.   Armen Avetyan and Tartevik Khachatryan - Արմեն Ավետյան եւ Տարթեվիկ խաչատրյան- engineers who run a school teaching robotics to children.

 

7.   Tigran Gyulumyan - Տիգրան Գյուլումյան – actor, director of open-air theater in rural Armenia.

 

8.   Karine Musikyan - Կարինե Սուսիկյան – A graduate of Yerevan State Conservatory after Komitas runs her own vocal studio teaching children Armenian folk song. Her students  performed during the ceremony singing a song from Sayat Nova.

 

9.   Tatevik Ghaltakhchyan - Տաթեւիկ Ղալթախչյան – Runs her own TEVQ art studio of hanhandmade jewelry and ceramics and teaches the young the art.

 

 

10.                  Ashot Safaryan - Աշոտ Սաֆարյան -After finishing his studies in Yerevan, he returned to his native village Vosgevan and founded IT OK teaching computer graphics to the local kids. 

11.                 Asya and Armen Grigoryans - Ասյա եւ Արմեն Գրիգորյաններ – A father and daughter team who design and manufacture children’s shoes.

12.                 Eric Hakhverdyan - Էրիկ Հախվերդյան runs an echo friendly organic gardening in his native village Pertavan.

13.                 Armen Martirosyan Արմեն Մարտիրոսյան – considers public health his mission and life's work. Through the «Children's Heathg Foundationn of Armenia», he founded he helps children with serious heath problemns receive treatment. 

Note: the video for those interested to watch.