Rev. Avedis Boynerian graciously forwards me his Sunday sermon ahead of time. This Sunday June 21, 2026, Rev. Avedis Boynerian’s sermon pertained to forgiveness. Vaհe H Apelian
Matthew 18:21-35 21 Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?” 22 Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times. 23 “Therefore, the kingdom of heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. 24 As he began the settlement, a man who owed him ten thousand bags of gold was brought to him. 25 Since he was not able to pay, the master ordered that he and his wife and his children and all that he had be sold to repay the debt. 26 “At this the servant fell on his knees before him. ‘Be patient with me,’ he begged, ‘and I will pay back everything.’ 27 The servant’s master took pity on him, canceled the debt and let him go. 28 “But when that servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred silver coins. He grabbed him and began to choke him. ‘Pay back what you owe me!’ he demanded. 29 “His fellow servant fell to his knees and begged him, ‘Be patient with me, and I will pay it back.’ 30 “But he refused. Instead, he went off and had the man thrown into prison until he could pay the debt. 31 When the other servants saw what had happened, they were outraged and went and told their master everything that had happened. 32 “Then the master called the servant in. ‘You wicked servant,’ he said, ‘I canceled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. 33 Shouldn’t you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?’ 34 In anger his master handed him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed. 35 “This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother or sister from your heart.”
Forgiveness 101
One day, as we just read, the apostle Peter came up to Jesus and asked Him, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me?
Up to seven times?” (21).
Here’s Peter, the one who needed forgiveness himself, is concerned with how many times he had to forgive someone else.
Let’s face it!
We all have difficulties that keep us from forgiving others.
We have
-a limit that we do not want to cross,
-a limit we won’t go beyond.
I can think of at least 3 barriers of an unforgiving heart:
-Revenge: “I am going to get even!”
-Resentment: “I am going to stay angry!”
-Remembering: “I will never forget!”
We all have asked the question Peter asked:
“How many times do I have to forgive them?
I am getting tired of it.
Why do they keep hurting me?”
Peter may have been thinking of a time when somebody wronged him and he had extended forgiveness.
But, this same person did something to hurt him the next day.
Again, Peter forgave him.
A couple days later, his friend lied to him.
This time, Peter reluctantly forgave him.
But now, he’s had enough.
Peter wanted Jesus to help him set some forgiveness limits.
Peter wanted to know when it’s OK to say, “That’s it. You have messed up one too many times?”
Whatever is the case, before Jesus could answer, Peter responded to his own question and suggested that 7 times would be a good limit.
That’s not a bad answer.
The rabbis back then taught that you had to forgive someone 3 times and then you could retaliate. The 4th time, you could do whatever you liked. In fact, the rabbis, mistakenly taught that God only forgives 3 times.
Peter raised that number to 7, thinking his answer would impress Jesus.
To be honest, forgiving someone 7 times is commendable.
Most of us get frustrated, if we have to forgive someone twice or 3 times.
By human standards, what Peter said was commendable and overgenerous.
But Peter wanted
-a number,
-a limit,
-a place where he could finally say, “That’s it. You are not getting away with this any longer. Our friendship is now over.”
As Jesus often does, His answer to Peter was unexpected: “I tell you,
-not seven times, but
-seventy times seven” (22).
Peter could not believe his ears!
70 times 7?
He got out his calculator and punched in the numbers. That’s 490 times!
(Jesus is not suggesting that we count the number of times we forgive someone.
70 times 7 means there is no limit to the number of times we are to forgive someone.
(Actually, if we were to count, by the time we reach 490, we would be in the habit of continual and unlimited forgiveness.
(That’s precisely the point Jesus is making - (we do not keep score when it comes to forgiveness.
Since the truth of forgiveness without limits is hard for us to grasp, Jesus told a story to help illustrate what He meant.
In the first half of the story, Jesus deals with those of us who need forgiveness.
In the second half, Jesus targets those of us who need to forgive others.
Let’s start: “The kingdom of heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants.
As he began the settlement, a man who owed him 10,000 talents was brought to him” (23-24).
Here’s the picture.
-The king decided to call in all his debts.
-He sent out his collection agents and they came back with a man who owed the king a huge amount of money.
Since the man could not pay the debt, “the master ordered that he and his wife and his children and all that he had be sold to repay the debt” (25).
The king knew he could never get back all his losses - he just wanted to get back whatever he could.
At this point, the servant did what most of us would have done.
-He fell on his knees and said, “Be patient with me, and I will pay back everything.”
-Even though the servant could never pay it back, he’s now desperate.
The king was moved.
-He was filled with compassion.
-And, he did something the man did not even ask for.
The king not only released him, he also forgave all his debt.
This was at great personal cost to the king. He wiped the slate clean - He canceled the debt. All of it!
Now the man owed the king nothing!
This is exactly what forgiveness is all about.
(-It means to cancel the debt - all of it.
When we have wronged someone and they choose to forgive us, they are in essence saying, (“I cancel your debt. You do not owe me anything. Therefore, I release you from ever having to pay me back.”
I want you to notice that (the servant did not deserve this forgiveness; it was purely an act of grace on the part of the king.
C. S. Lewis, the English professor and author, says, (“Forgiveness by its nature is for the unworthy.”
Let me give you 3 action steps, if you are in need of forgiveness.
1 - Face your friend. The first step we need to take, if we are the guilty party, is to meet with our friend or foe, face-to-face.
-Is there anyone you need to face?
-Is there anyone you need to call?
2- Own the wrong. The second step is to own the wrong that has been done. When we mess up in our relationships, Jesus wants us to own the wrong by saying, “It’s my mistake.”
3 - Ask for release. The third step is to ask for release. I suggest that we actually say the words, “Please, forgive me.” If our friend says something like, “It’s no big deal, do not worry about it.” We might want to say, “I appreciate that, but I need to have your forgiveness. Do you forgive me?” It’s really important to be released from the debt.
Well, how about when we need to forgive others.
Let’s go back to the story.
As this humbled man walked away with this gift of forgiveness, he ran into a friend who owed him about 10 bucks, which compared to his debt, is nothing. Instead of canceling his friend’s debt, he grabbed him and began to choke him saying, “Pay back what you owe me!” (28).
We are a lot like that, aren’t we?
When someone does wrong, we want to see them punished and pay for the damage they have done to us.
Jesus continues by telling us that the forgiven man’s friend fell to his knees and asked for some time:
In fact, his plea was almost identical to the other man’s when he was before the king:
He said, “Be patient with me, and I will pay you back.”
But, there’s one big difference.
Instead of forgiving the wrong out of gratitude for the forgiveness he had received, “he went off and had the man thrown in prison until he could pay the debt” (30).
-We are a lot like this man when we do not forgive others.
-We enjoy putting people in prison, if they have wronged us.
-We want them to suffer, to hurt, as bad as they hurt us.
This man threw his friend in prison and the word got to the king.
The king was really angry now. He sent his soldiers to bring the man before him. He said: “I canceled all your debt because you begged me to. Shouldn’t you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?” In anger his master turned him over to the torturers until he paid back all he owed (32-34).
What happened to that man will happen to each of us, unless we learn to forgive and forgive and forgive: forgive 70 times 7!
+We will be tortured by anger and bitterness.
+We will lie awake at night worrying over every wrong that someone has done to us just because we will not forgive from our heart.
Here’s the massage.
(While we often try to punish and imprison those who hurt us, the reverse actually happens.
(When we do not forgive, we end up being tortured.
Question: Do you know where the worst prison is. It’s the prison of an unforgiving heart.
A professor of theology has said, “When I genuinely forgive, I set a prisoner free and then discover that the prisoner I set free, was me.”
Isn’t that true?
When we choose to not forgive, we imprison ourselves.
Have we ever noticed that (some of the most miserable people are those who are unwilling to forgive others?
Story: Two men, who were in a nursing home, had been quarreling for years. One of them thought he was on his deathbed. So. he called his foe over to his bed and said, “Bill, I forgive you for what you have said and done against me over the years, and I want you to do the same for me.”
The other man, with tears in his eyes, agreed that he too would like to forgive and be forgiven. (Lisen) Then the man in the bed said, “But ((if I get better, this does not count!”
To forgive is a process of giving up. That’s exactly what the word forgiveness means - it means,
-“to give” to someone by releasing them from debt.
-It also carries the idea of “releasing and freeing yourself.”
-It’s like saying, “You did something that really hurt me. But I care enough about you.
-So, I release you from all obligations to ever pay me back.
-I forgive you completely.”
We extend forgiveness because all of us are imperfect human beings in need of being forgiven and in need of grace.
Here’s a definition on forgiveness: “Forgiveness is like meeting someone for the first time.”
That means there’s
+No baggage.
+No history.
+No grudges.
+No hidden resentments.
+Nothing attached!
To forgive means “to start over by giving someone a fresh start. ”In short, to forgive is to give grace to another and freedom to ourselves.
The Bible says: “Bear with each other and
-forgive whatever grievances you have against one another
-forgive as the Lord forgave you” (Colossians 3:13).
We can tolerate those who irritate us and forgive our friends and family members when they wrong us, precisely because Jesus has forgiven us.
Since Jesus has forgiven us, then, out of gratitude, we should forgive one another.
Where are you today?
1- Do you need to ask someone for forgiveness?
If so, then determine - choose to
+face them,
+own their wrong and
+ask for their release.
2- Do you need to forgive anyone?
Are we tired of living with an unforgiving heart?
If so, then cancel that debt today and restore that friendship by offering forgiveness.
I earnestly pray and hope that you will not leave this service without making a decision that can radically change your life and the quality of your friendships by asking forgiveness from someone and extend forgiveness to someone.
Prayer: Heavenly Father, thank You for Your grace. Teach us to forgive those who have hurt us, just as You have forgiven us. Give us humble hearts to ask for forgiveness when we have wronged others. Remove the unforgiveness that is within us, and fill us with Your grace. Help us to walk in obedience to Your Word and to live in harmony with one another.
In Jesus’ name we pray, amen.
