Virgina Apelian: American Armenian Alliance Against Domestic Abuse (AAAaDA)

AAAaDa

Vahe H. Apelian

AAAaDa is the acronym for American Armenian Alliance Against Domestic Abuse. The alliance was founded and is spearheaded by Mrs. Virginia Apelian after her fact-finding mission trip to Armenia regarding domestic violence in Armenia.

Virginia took the trip to Armenia from April 28 to May 9, 2017. Her trip was partially funded by the Armenian Missionary Association of America (AMAA) and a few members of the Armenian Presbyterian Church in Paramus, NJ. Virginia covered the bulk of the expenditure of her trip. Months before her departure she prepared teaching materials about mutual assertiveness, empowerment and sent them to Rev. Megerdich Melkonian who had them translated into Eastern Armenian for distribution. Upon landing in the Yerevan Zvartnots Airport, Maro Matossian, who is the Executive Director of the Women Support Center (WSC) greeted her and brought her to the hotel not far from their site. WSC is a non-governmental organization (NGO) and is established by the Tufenkian Foundation offering help and shelter to abused women.

Upon her return, Virginia issued a report about her trip and submitted it to AMAA and to the session of the Armenian Presbyterian Church (APC). In her report, she noted that during her stay she started working through WSC and met young Armenian men and women and gave them presentations for building mutual trust self-respect, esteem, and empowerment to raise the next generation with such values. She also cited the following statistics about domestic violence in Armenia stating that 20% occur in homes, 2% outside the home, 2% at unknown locations, 68% of the reported abuse women died in rural areas, while 37% of the reported abused women died in urban areas.

Regarding the age of the victims, Virginia reported the following age group statistics: 10% were 60-69 years old; 20%,  50-59 years old; 5%, between 40 to 49 years old; 35%, between 30-39 years old and 30%, between 20-29 years old. It is apparent that the majority of the victims of domestic violence are young women.

Driven by these statistics Virginia spearheaded the AAAaDa. The alliance is chaired by her and co-chaired by Dr. Garbis Der Yeghiayan. Dr. Vahe H. Apelian and Berjouhy Barsoumian are the vice-chairs of the alliance, which has forty members and is growing.

Having gained the trust and the support of the members of the Alliance, Virginia Apelian wrote letters to the following Armenian Diaspora organizations that do charitable and relief works in Armenia: AMAA, AGBU (Armenian General Benevolent Union), AAA (Armenian Assembly of America), ANCA (Armenian National Committee of America), ARS (Armenian Relief Society), ABA (Armenian Bar Association), ATG (Armenian Technology Group), Prelacy and Diocese urging them to petition the Armenian Government to pass laws that would hold the abusers accountable for their horrible acts. It appears that the Armenian Government does not yet have sufficient laws or lacks enforcement of existing laws against domestic violence or abuse to persecute perpetrators of such horrible acts.

In her October 6, 2017, report Anush Mkrtchian reported that (Azatutyun.am): “Violence against women had for decades been a taboo subject in the socially conservative and male-dominated Armenian society. It has been receiving growing publicity in recent years thanks to the activities of women’s rights groups backed by international human rights watchdogs.” She further noted that: “According to the Yerevan-based Women’s Resource Center, more than 50 Armenian women have been beaten to death and killed otherwise by their husbands or other relatives in the last five years. This trend shows no signs of decline,” said a representative of the group, Anahit Simonian. “I think this is a very serious number and this process [of a enacting a law] must not drag on further.”

Neglecting to address the domestic violence issue in Armenia has given rise to a new unsettling practice that will have a profound effect on the future of the Armenian demography, and that is selective abortion.

Anna Pujol-Mazzini quoted the following in her report (Thomson Reuters Foundation, News, Monday 9, October 2017): "My husband and my mother-in-law forced me to figure out if it was a boy or a girl. When they found out it was a girl, they made me have an abortion," said Aghalaryan, whose name was changed to avoid being stigmatized in her community.” The author further elaborated on the practice of selective abortion in Armenia stating that “For Armenian families, giving birth to at least one boy is a must, to continue the family line and carry forward the surname is a society where daughters often marry and move away.” She further noted that in 2012-2013, 114 boys were born in Armenia for every 100 girls, according to the United Nations Populations Fund (UNFPA)  - this is the third largest sex-selective abortion rate in the world after China and neighboring Azerbaijan”.

These deplorable situations are well known by the Diaspora Armenian charitable and relief organizations that assist the citizens of Armenia. They have mostly distanced themselves from the issue and have resisted taking a stand against the situation on the pretext that they do not want to come across interfering in the internal affairs of Armenia or in the domestic lives. In her drive to enlist the help of Armenians supporting her endeavor, Virginia encountered the same mindset. Many explicitly shied away from joining her Alliance on record noting the same.

Pressing the government to pass legislation against domestic abuse is taking hold in Armenia at the grassroots level.  In the same report, Anush Mkrtchian reported that: “Justice Minister Davit Harutiunian expressed serious concern over these figures on Thursday. “Violence is not the foundation of a real and strong Armenian family,” he told a news conference. Harutiunian said that the Armenian government intends to tackle the problem with a law drafted by the Justice Ministry last year. Both he and another senior ministry official, Gohar Hakobian, expressed hope that the bill will be debated and passed by the parliament soon.” The issue remains a hotly contested subject on the limits of such laws not to intrude in the sanctity of the family.

The Alliance that Virginia Apelian founded and has been spearheading is the first formal attempt by an Armenia Diaspora community to take a stand against these issues in Armenia and invite the other Armenian organizations to equally take a  stand against this deplorable situation and join force with like-minded in Armenia to have the Armenian government institute and enforce laws against these practices and engage in a country-wide education against such horrid practices. 

As to Virginia Matosian Apelian, she is a psychologist, experienced assertiveness trainer, lecturer and author of three books: “Musa Dagh Girl”, “Truly Beautiful Inside and Out” and “Aliens Celebrating Christmas”. With her bold approach to raising awareness of domestic violence in Armenia and selective abortion, and confronting these horrid practices head-on, Virginia has given credence to her extraction, as a bold and a daring descendent of the famed Musa Daghtsis.